2-26-02

The NC-17 Update. Don't get excited, it's not what you're hoping it is. But there's a section below that, by it's very nature, requires that I affix the following sticker to this site.

So, enough of the intro, let's just get to it. I'm too tired to BS around here. Content, here we come!!

Here is a picture of Kumate-sensei. What a nice-lookin' guy, eh? Kumate-sensei has become my best English student ever. He is intensely curious about learning new grammar, honing his pronunciation and even practices constantly on the other teachers. The catch? This week's lesson consisted of 'asshole,' 'shit' and 'kiss my ass.' Doesn't look like such a cute, cuddly teddy-bear of a man any more, does he?

Now before you start in on me for being a mischievous little bastard and corrupting the good citizens of peaceful Japan, let me tell you that this was all his doing!! He already knew 'shit' and upon learning what it actually meant, immediately asked for more.

He had heard 'asshole' in a Police Academy movie (ah, the Police Academy movies; America's finest cultural ambassadors) and wanted to know what it meant. Before I could even attempt an explanation, Shiraki-sensei (one of the English teachers) jumps in and not only explains, but also gives him the variation of 'kiss my ass.' So you see, I actually had nothing to do with introducing him to any of it. But I figure he's going to say it anyway, so he might as well pronounce it right. I coach accents, nothing more!!

So, this morning, I'm sitting at my desk waiting for the morning meeting to begin, having a nice intimate moment with my coffee, when what should I hear from the copy room but, "Asshole!! Shit, kiss my ass!!" A moment later, Kumate-sensei comes walking out with a smile on his face, pleased as punch that his pronunciation is coming along so well.

It's so bizarre to watch this in action. Things that would result in black-eyes and lost-jobs back home, instead produce curiosity and praise from onlookers here. Case in point: yesterday as Kumate-sensei was working on one of the 'public' computers, Murayama-sensei came and sat down at the computer next to him. With no warning, Kumate-sensei turns and broadsides him with "ASSHOLE!!" to which Murayama-sensei responded, unflinchingly with applause (yes, he actually clapped) and said, "Wonderful! What does it mean?"

Kind of makes you think about what really makes those dirty words your parents told you not to say, so dirty after all.

Speaking of English and reasonable facimilies thereof, two more Engrish entries are up for your approval.

Yakuba(Town Office) Trip

Now I don't want to suggest that all Japanese are alcoholics, but.... oh wait, yes I do!! So this weekend was the Town Office group trip to Nagasaki. We showed up at 8:40am. The bus started moving at 9am sharp. The first beer was cracked at 9am 40 seconds. There was a glass of cognac placed in my unwitting hand at 9:14am (which I promptly did-not-drink). Still think I'm out of line with that first comment?

Okay, okay. Maybe you're not convinced. Perhaps you would be, had you been with Fletcher and I when we we showed up for breakfast at the hotel the next morning and were immediately offered beer...with breakfast.... at 7:30am!!! It was all I could do to keep the words "What the hell is the matter with you people!?!?" from bursting out of my mouth.

8:56am. Ready to roll! See the guy standing in the middle? That's Hirowatari-san. Keep an eye on him - this guy is 136% entertainment. We're going to be doing something with him on the site soon. Hell, I could probably just make a web site about him and it would be more interesting than this one.	10:03am Who are the sober people in this picture? (Trick Question!! There aren't any.)	11:45am Usually morning hangovers come from the night before. With this crew they just come from earlier that morning.

Aside from the rampant alcoholism, the trip was pretty cool. Well, it got cool when we got to Nagasaki anyway. The first stop before Nagasaki was actually the very shrine I was at last weekend with my school's teachers!! That's what I love about the JET Programme. I get to come to faraway exotic lands and see their shrine.

Hmmm, does this place look familiar?	No, sir. No drunken brolly-dancing on this trip.	Chinatown looks like Chinatown no matter what town it's in. ;)	Nothing like a game of Shougi with a total stranger, in front of other strangers, outside, on the street, on a cold day. Ahhhhhh.

Nagasaki is neat! Granted we were only in the city-proper for the day, but I was quite taken with it. It seems that very little is built on level flat land, and most of it actually lies in the surrounding hills. Very cool. We didn't really see a whole lot of the city since we were there instead for the Chinese Lantern Festival. Me and Fletcher strolled through Chinatown, and Hirowatari-san treated us to a game of Pachinko, but that was about it. I definitely want to go back sometime when I'm not with a huge group and take my time to wander around, go to the bomb museum, and not be constantly offered beer.

I think the best part of the entire trip was when me and Fletcher went into some random souvenir shop. We were looking around for stuff to shell out to our school staff when we get back, when what should we see but a life-size CatBus!! Ooooh, Scotty was a happy camper, believe me you. For anyone who's seen Totoro, I encourage you to enlarge the picture below. Enlarge it now!!

Next Stop: Little Sister!!	Random Nagasaki pic.

Sorry this post is so sparse, but I've been so busy lately that I haven't had the time or energy to put much of anything together. Also, I'm sure most of you have noticed that updates don't exactly come on a regular basis around here, so I just want to take the opportunity to remind everyone that there is a convenient mailing list you can sign up for (links are at the bottom of every page) to receive a quick message from me whenever I get around to posting an update. It might be easier than checking in every few days or whatever. Just wanted to mention it.

See you in a few.

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